OLDER WOMEN, YOUNGER MEN

What to do? What to do? Ahh that little voice in your head, don't you just love it? You know the one that says no, when, sometimes, you really want to say yes? And the voice that says yes, when you should have said no!

If there's one thing dating has taught me it's this: there really are no rules—lots of hits n' misses and maybe a rule of thumb, or two—but no rules.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss the mark a few times. It's all part of the process—the dating process—the good, the bad and the ugly. But believe it or not, it's not that bad.

While I will say that I've never been known to date younger men, I'm not out-ruling it anymore, either. And yes I said anymore.

There was a time when I forbid myself from dating any man younger than 40 and any man older than 50. I set myself an age limit of who I would date and who I wouldn't.

Hindsight, I only hurt myself. A small regret I live with because I missed out on a few good men.

Nevertheless, my mentality has loosened up a bit, all in part to a good friend—who by the way is 13 years my junior.

He's taught me that it's ok. And although it took him a minute to beat it into my stubborn ways—I admit it—he's a great friend and I highly value his opinions. 

So here's what I say to the older woman—younger man saga.

IF YOU'RE GOING TO DO IT, DO IT... but

  • Don't act like a party girl. If he wanted a party girl, he'd be with one.

  • Dress your age. Dressing half your age makes you look twice your age. 

  • Don't be Miss Pop Culture. Play music you like and talk about things that interest you too. Keep it real and for goodness sakes don't keep up with the Kardashian's.

  • Don't act catty toward younger women. An insecure woman—regardless of her age—is unattractive.

  • Don't judge him. His apartment might be messy and his clothes not so tailored; but note, I bet neither were yours at his age.

  • Don't lie about your kids. Your children are your pride and joy, be upfront always—even if your kids are older—never hide them from the world, let alone a man.

  • Don't mother him. He has mom! If you want to be a mom, go home to your kids. 

  • Don't be a controlling conversationalist. Interrupting him when he's talking or ball-hogging the conversation with chit-chat about what you do, what you know and who you are, is rude.

  • Don't lie about your age. He knows you're older. If he wasn't interested, he wouldn't be there. Remember, he asked you out, have fun with it.

  • Don't be a snob. If you accept a date with a younger man, be nice. You may be a bit more refined but that doesn't make you better. 

  • Don't focus on age. Once you allow yourself "a date" with a younger man, enjoy yourself. At the end of the day, it's just a date.

Rule of thumb—not rules—simply principles to practice!

Be Realistic!

Draw the line on that age gap because there is such a thing as too young; agree or disagree, but there is! If a man is closer in age to your kids—more than he is to you—then he needs to be friends with your kids; not you!

Outside of that, have fun.